Tuesday, September 24, 2013

3 O'clock Snack


Amber crossed her arms and leaned back in her seat as she chewed on her second to last piece of Hubba Bubba gum. Trying to smack her lips loud enough to tune out the joyful sounds of her classmates packing up their book bags for the day, Amber watched Ellen and Melanie out of the corner of her eye. It wasn’t difficult for her to hear their conversation from the library table that she was sitting at.

“I can’t wait to go home, my mom said she was going to make brownies!” Ellen said.
“Oh, that sounds so good right now!” Melanie said as she slung her pink-sequined book bag over her shoulder. “I’m going to ask my mom to make some when I get home!”

Amber narrowed her eyebrows as she eavesdropped on Ellen and Melanie. She watched them walk past her, through the library, down the hallway, and around the corner until they were gone. How did they get their hair so shiny? Amber wondered. It made her think of puppies. Golden retriever puppies. With blonde and fluffy fur. So soft looking that you just have to touch. Touching her own hair, Amber sighed. Her hair felt mangy. If I was a puppy, I would be a mutt, Amber thought.

Holding her stomach, Amber thought about the brownies that Ellen and Melanie were going to eat once they got home. I bet their moms buy Betty Crocker mix. Amber thought. Not the off-brand stuff. She wondered if they got the milk chocolate or dark chocolate brownies. She hoped milk chocolate. Or maybe they bought the chocolate chunk kind. She also imagined Ellen and Melanie’s moms frosting their brownies, and letting them lick the spatulas once they were done.

Looking at the digital clock on the librarian’s desk off to her right, Amber held her stomach as it made a loud growling noise. At least now there wasn’t anybody around to hear. It was 3:07. Where was her tutor?

Two days ago, Amber had tried to make pizza rolls when she got home. She had been so hungry during school that the people sitting next to her were turning around, laughing and pointing. They even raised their hands and told the teacher. Ms. Putnam, listen to Amber’s stomach!
~
She had done everything that the box had said. She set the oven to 425 degrees. She had arranged the rolls 1 inch apart on an oven tray. She had even used her ruler from school to make sure she got exactly an inch. But once she put them in the oven, she forgot to turn the timer on. They were only supposed to be in the oven for 10 minutes. She was going to stand by the oven and watch them sizzle and bake, but just as she shut the oven door, she heard a dog bark outside. It sounded like it was standing on the porch, barking at the screen door. Hoping that it was a stray, Amber got excited and ran to the door. It was a big black lab, and it started jumping once it saw Amber at the door. She chased him around the yard and down the street, laughing, feeling the wind whip at her hair as she tried to catch the dog. Once she realized she couldn’t catch him, she ran back to the yard and grabbed a stick. This seemed to interest the black lab, who came bounding back to her. They played fetch for a while, and Amber marveled at how good he was at it. That was when she thought to look around his neck for a collar. She whistled at him to come to her. But he wouldn’t come. He was watching a rabbit across the street with his ears perked up. She was about to whistle at him again when she heard the smoke detector go off.
~

Amber watched her tutor as she came around the corner and walked down the hallway towards her. She started to chew her Hubba Bubba gum quicker and noticed that it had already lost its taste.

“How was high school today, Mother Mary?” said Amber as her tutor sat down in the seat across from her.

“Don’t call me that you little twerp.” said Mary as she flipped her hair across her shoulder and straightened out her tight t-shirt that had been working its way up her mid-section.

“That’s right, I can’t call you that because Mother Mary was a virgin.”

“I said shut up, you little brat!” said Mary. She flipped her hair again and crossed her right leg over her left. “Where’s your homework?”

“It’s all up here.” said Amber, pointing at her forehead.

“You know, I don’t have to help you.” said Mary, glancing at the clock on the librarian’s desk. It was 3:14. “We only have 15 minutes anyway.”

“You do too.” said Amber. “If you don’t help me, you don’t get volunteer hours, and then you won’t get confirmed. And it’s 16 minutes. You’re not very good at math, I don’t think I want you helping me anyway.”

Mary put her hand on her forehead and sighed. Amber looked at her nails. They were long and sparkly. Amber’s stomach growled. Mary looked up without taking her head out of her hand.

“Was that your stomach?” she said, her face all scrunched up.

“Yeah, so?”

“Jesus, why don’t you eat something?” Mary said, sitting back up in her seat and looking back at the clock. 3:15.

“My mom never makes me anything. She never makes me brownies like other moms.”

Mary shook her head and sighed. “Well, maybe if you weren’t such a brat she would make you brownies.

Amber popped a bubble with her Hubba Bubba gum. She doubted it.

~

The smoke detector was going off and the black lab had run away. Amber burst inside, letting the screen door slam behind her, hoping the alarm hadn’t woken her mom up. But as she ran into the kitchen, she saw her mom with a dirty dish towel, waving her hand at the smoke as she put the tray of black pizza rolls on the stovetop.

“God, Amber- what the fuck is your problem?” she said as she threw the dish towel on the counter.

“I was hungry.” said Amber. She wondered if the black lab would ever come back. She wondered if it had a collar. It probably did, but she could dream that it didn’t.

“Well set a goddamn timer next time.”

Amber looked at her mother. Her jeans were the smallest size you could buy at the store and they were still falling off of her waist. Her white tank top wasn’t white anymore, and there were holes and cigarette burns everywhere on her shirt. Amber watched as her mother opened cupboards, looking for her pack of cigarettes.

“Wasn’t the pizza roll smoke enough for you?”

“Dammit Amber, don’t you be a smart-ass. I’m your mother.”

“Pretty shitty one, if you ask me.”

Her mom didn’t hear her. She had found a cigarette and was lighting it. She took a long drag and blew the smoke into the kitchen. Amber watched the cigarette smoke as it blended in with the pizza roll smoke. She coughed and held her nose. It made an awful smell.

“Good night, Amber. Don’t stay up too late.”

Amber watched her mother walk into her bedroom and shut the door. Amber looked at the clock on the stove. It was 4:13.

~

Mary left at 3:18. Her phone had buzzed and she had laughed. Then she got up and left. Amber figured that meant she could go home too.

As she walked home, Amber watched for the black lab. She wanted to play fetch again and she wanted to see if she could teach him any new tricks. But she didn’t find him. She spit out her Hubba Bubba gum in the grass as she walked up to the front door of her house. She let the screen door slam behind her, knowing that it wouldn’t wake up her mom. She was still surprised that the smoke detector had woken her up.

Amber started opening up cupboards in the kitchen. She threw boxes on the floor that felt empty. Cheerios boxes, Club cracker boxes, Fruit Roll-Up boxes. She found a bag of blueberry muffin mix. Pushing the blueberry muffin mix aside, she saw a red box. She jumped up a little to reach it. Chocolate Brownie Mix. It wasn’t Betty Crocker, but at this point, Amber didn’t care. She got out a mixing bowl, a spoon, and a pan to put the brownie batter in. She mixed up the ingredients and turned on the oven. She made sure to set the timer. This time she was being careful. But as Amber watched her brownies, she couldn’t help but eye the smoke detector. With each second that the brownies baked, she felt more anxious. She couldn’t take it anymore. She didn’t want her mom to wake up. She didn’t want her to ruin her brownies. So Amber took her last piece of Hubba Bubba chewing gum out of her pocket. She unwrapped it and started to chew. She only chewed for a minute. It still had a lot of flavor. She grabbed a chair and set it in front of the counter. Slowly climbing onto the counter while holding the cupboard for support, Amber stuck her last piece of Hubba Bubba gum over the sensor on the smoke detector. She just wanted to eat her brownies in peace.